Global what?

In light of US Congress rejecting the $700bn bailout, I was compelled to cast my mind back to ’06 and ’07, when it seemed like the upcoming US election was going to be the ‘environmental’ election. Remember how Al Gore was absolutely everywhere, getting all the love and attention that you necessarily miss out on when you’re VP to Mr. Party Time himself, Slick Willy Clinton?

Now think about the last few months of campaigning in the US. “Will a woman or a black dude get on the Democrat ticket?” “Is John McCain going to live long enough to be sworn in should he (God forbid) win?” “Who the fuck are Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac?” “Can Cleatus and Charlene overcome the phonetic similarities between Obama and Osama come election day (and were they even going to get out the vote anyway)?” These were the questions that started to emerge.

Now, with the ‘financial meltdown’ taking centre stage (and summer fast approaching down here in the Southern Hemisphere), it gives me great pleasure to announce that we don’t care anymore about that pie-in-the-sky conservationist global warming crap (which hasn’t even been proven to a certainty yet) – so crank up the airconditioner, don’t think twice about that 3rd shower that you were planning on having just coz you went outside in the heat for a minute and it made you feel ‘icky and sticky.’

It’s financial armaggedon, motherfuckers. The least we could do is help the environment catch up. Luckily, it isn’t that far behind.

WeeeeeHeeuuwwwwww!!!!

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